Cats Are Everywhere

Let’s talk about the fact that cats are literally everywhere and what our feelings are about that.

1. Cats. They are everywhere.

2. Upon entering a room, you might, at first glance, be forgiven for saying to yourself, “There is no cat here.” But you would be wrong. Look closely.

3. The reason for your mistake is that cats, steeped as they are in the dark mysteries of the universe, are masters of disguise.

4. The photo below, for instance, which appears to be of an empty room with a carpet and a curtain, actually contains a hidden cat.

5. And if this picture of a trashy couch with some pillows and soft toys could speak, it would divulge a secret that would amaze and frighten you. “There is also,” it would say, in a whisper, “a cat here.”

6. In this room, a paper bag has been carelessly tossed onto the floor. Nothing else of note appears to the casual observer. But is there more here than the eye can see?

7. And here, an empty bed cries out for the warmth of an occupant. “Will no one rest their weary limbs upon me?” it seems to implore. But hush! Look again. Not with your eyes, but with your inner sight. Is this bed truly as empty as it seems?

8. Here, a gentleman attends to his necessaries before embarking upon his day. Surely there is nothing else remarkable about such a common occurrence. Surely!

9. Our bathrooms, after all, are sacred. The only places in this crowded world where we can truly be alone.

10. For, crowded as this world may be, it is ultimately in solitude that we must shuffle through our lives.

11. In solitude that we must provide food and drink to sustain ourselves …

12. … in solitude that we must prepare each morning to face the travails of a new day.

13. … and in solitude that we must return to our empty armchairs of an evening to contemplate the day’s passing.

14. But as we gaze out of our windows and ruminate upon these truths …

15. … as we pass from the fleeting moments of our leisure and our playtime to bear, alone, the weight of our work and our industry …

16. … let us remember that all is not always as it seems.

17. That where our lives may seem empty, there is merely a fulness that we have never observed.

18. Because (unnoticed by even the keenest eyes), through every open doorway …

19. … behind every closed curtain …

20. … inside every empty box …

21. … lurks a cat.

22. Shrouded in mystery, cloaked in darkness, and hidden from mortal eyes. But rest assured that they are here.

23. Cats are everywhere.

24. The end.

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