1. Waiting to hear back from someone is a special kind of hell you never want to be in.
2. Every time you send a text out into the universe, you have TRS (Texting Remorse Syndrome).
Wait… there’s a typo. UNSEND. UNSEND, YOU HEINOUS WITCH!
3. There are roughly a zillion texting rules, yet none of them make sense.
4. Every time you have to send a text, a little of your soul dies.
5. People have stopped texting you, because they know you fucking hate it.
6. And you get a secret pleasure when you can piss someone off over text.
7. You’ve started to realize that getting a group text is someone’s way of saying they actually hate you.
8. You know calling is faster, but can’t, because you won’t have friends anymore.
OK, cool, yeah, let’s figure out which movie to go to via text for the next two hours, that’s a great use of my time. GAHHHH.
9. If you’re hanging out with friends, it seems like you’re the only one NOT texting.
10. And you often want to call them out, because they’re supposed to be hanging out with YOU, not their phone.
The entree just arrived, so… Oh? Still texting? Cool.
11. You have spent countless minutes trying to decipher emoticon meanings, only to realize that emoticons are ridiculous.
12. And texting shorthand is not really your thing.
14. And you have a hard time understanding people who analyze every word of their texts.
15. Seeing the “typing” ellipses for more than a minute has sent you into actual fits of rage.
WHAT ARE YOU TYPING?! It better be a damn poem apologizing for this.
16. You have considered breaking up with someone if they text too much.
If this is the only way we’ll be communicating, then let’s not. OK? BIIIIIII.
17. Autocorrect has made you its bitch more times than you care to recall.
18. People have called you out for ignoring their texts all together, and all you can say is #sorrynotsorry.
19. You’re constantly worrying that people will take a text the wrong way because they can’t hear your tone of voice.
This leads you to text stuff like, LOL and ROTFL!!! so they don’t get angry. And then you feel like a tool.