How To Make Your Summer A "Wet Hot American Summer"

Because Michael Showalter wants you all inside of him. Wait… posted on

1. Eat tons of BBQ and then MAKEEE OUTTT.

2. Learn how to turn everything into a compliment.

4. And smear mud on your ass.

6. And then have Janeane Garofalo marry you and your new lover.

7. Set unrealistic expectations for everyone around you.

8. But know that they won’t live up to those. At. All.

9. Thwart sexual advances from Camp Directors.

11. And swimming buddies.

12. Pretty much just fuck everyone, really.

13. On that note: Be slutty!

People love sluts!

15. Taking off your shirt should help with that.

16. Oh, and don’t forget to buy extra lube!!!

17. Acknowledge your own shortcomings.

18. As well as everyone else’s.

19. Pull out the jazz hands whenever possible.

20. Go into town, even if it’s just for an hour.

21. Trash a Nurse’s office

22. Buy booty shorts that barely hide your balls.

23. Cry it out when you need to.

24. And when crying isn’t enough, just say exactly what you’re feeling.

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