If you can, start practicing at an offensively young age.
But if you're starting later in life, fill a baby bottle with beer to help you catch up with the toddler group.
Practice licking often, and not just with beer bottles!
Try lapping at a comically large bottle of wine.
Or practice on your hot pink bowling ball, for example.
When you're ready for the real beer bottle deal, bring a friend for moral support.
Have him hold the bottle while you lick.
Or feed it to you, like a momma beer bear.
Eventually, solo beer licking glory will be yours for the taking!
And it will be stupendous.
