18 Reasons Why Jessica Chastain Is Cooler Than You

Just try not to fall in love with her.

1. Sometimes people just give her statues!

Image by Kevin Winter / Getty Images

2. And when they do, she dances like this.

Dance on, girl.

Source: vontrapps.tumblr.com

3. She looks good, even when she’s the only one not wearing camo.

Image by Columbia Pictures Industries, Inc., Jonathan Olley / AP

4. This yearbook photo is how she got discovered*!

(*Discovered to be the only person alive who takes fabulous yearbook photos.)

Source: i.huffpost.com

5. She’s dating Brad Pitt AND Sean Penn.

They like to swap nights, like sister husbands.

Source: Pascal Le Segretain/Getty Images

6. Just kidding, she’s dating Loki from “The Avengers.”

Get it, girl.

Source: Dave M. Benett/Getty Images

7. This is her three-legged dog.

Source: Zelig Shaul/ACE/INFphoto.com

His name is Chaplin. They like long walks on the beach.

And, again, he’s got three legs.

Source: Zelig Shaul/ACE/INFphoto.com

8. Her credits include “Madagascar 3.”

And she lists that film in her playbill bio.

Source: poninepontmercy.tumblr.com

9. She has really big hair. It’s filled with secrets!

Really terrible secrets that will haunt your waking dreams.

Via: ellecanada.com

10. She fights crime in her Louboutins.

And then hides the bodies in Sean Penn’s mansion.

Source: Henry Lamb/Photowire/BEImages

11. Her celebrity crush is Sirius Black.

Or Gary Oldman. Whatever works.

Source: favim.com

12. Her clothes inexplicably fall off just so we can know what heaven is like.

Source: Courtesy of British GQ  /  via: gq-magazine.co.uk

13. She’s a ginger.

Redheads, unite!

Source: johjohsoares.tumblr.com

14. Sometimes she’s blonde, though.

Source: Courtesy of DreamWorks

15. She really likes old people.

This one happens to be her grandma, and she is faboo.

Via: style.com

16. Anna Wintour wants to sleep with her.

Image by Pascal Le Segretain / Getty Images

17. So does Amanda Seyfried.

Source: Jeff Kravitz/FilmMagic

18. The Olsen twins just like to hold each other and stand next to her.

They can’t handle all of the redhead heat she radiates.

Image by Larry Busacca / Getty Images