1. The couple who tell everyone else what they should be doing.
And usually it’s horribly wrong.
2. The couple who should really just text each other this shit.
4. FOR REAL, IF YOU DON’T TEXT THEN JUST DIRECT MESSAGE.
5. The couple who misquote sappy text as a way of professing their love.
Here’s the correct quote, friends: “When it was dark, you always carried the sun in your hand for me.”
Note: Kudos to that guy for shutting this down.
6. The couple who announce they’re pregnant with a bottle of crappy pasta sauce.
9. The couple who only post photos of themselves.
10. And kissing profile photos, in general.
11. The couple who passive-aggressively fight through status updates.
12. Or the glowing bride who wants to make everyone around her feel the warmth.
13. And the worst couple of all: the pair who share a Facebook page.
Let’s just hope none of us ever commit this sin.
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