2.
"What happened last night?"
3.
"This is the closest to death I've ever felt."
4.
"I seriously don't remember anything after howling 'Who Let The Dogs Out' with that black lab."
5.
"Why do I still taste tequila?"
6.
"I need water in the worst way."
7.
"There's an actual desert in my mouth."
8.
"I can hear my heart beat in my skull."
9.
"Has anyone seen my pants?"
10.
"Did I make out with that cat? Please tell me no."
11.
"I need greasy fast food in my stomach to soak up this river of alcohol."
12.
"What? Is there something on my face?"
13.
"I never want to leave this bed. This bed is my new home."
14.
"Light feels like a thousand silvery swords stabbing me directly in the eye holes."
15.
"I'm just trying to forget what the word 'beer' even means."
16.
"Did we even know those cocker spaniels that showed up at 2 a.m.?"
17.
"I vaguely remember puking then eating it."
18.
"I'm not even sure whose bra this is."
19.
"If I shut my eyes I can still hear techno beats."
20.
"A thousand bacon, egg, and cheese sandwiches couldn't make this right."
21.
"Crap, did someone write something on my back? I can't read."
22.
"I'm not sure if I'm hungover or still drunk."
