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    • EmF725

      I’m not going to invalidate your feelings, because everyone is justified to their own feelings, but with that being said, I do have a question for you. Do you have children who knew you as a man before your transition? If there is one thing I know from watching Caitlyn share her story and the years before she was open about it, it’s that she loves her children, both biological and stepchildren. When you talk about the hurt and fear you felt in the bar that night, I think maybe that is the same kind of hurt and fear Caitlyn felt to hear her children say things like “I’m not ready for Bruce to be gone,” or “What am I supposed to call you?” Who’s to say keeping her birth name and pronouns for an extra few weeks publicly was to give her children the time to get used to the idea of this being public before Caitlyn was introduced. And yes, I know this in part was calculated for the Vanity Fair cover, but that doesn’t mean there wasn’t some benefit for her children to see their dad be largely accepted by the world as a woman.  And while I totally understand how you think this could adversely affect the trans community as a whole, I think it doesn’t if you look at it from another angle. Quite honestly, to me, the lesson is that if and when I know someone who is transitioning, I will start using their preferred name and pronouns when they’re ready for me to use them. There are always going to be people who maliciously and ignorantly don’t use your preferred pronouns. They’re not the ones you should educate. Educate the people who accept and understand but still need some education on what is appropriate vs. what isn’t. And I’m sorry, but for me, I think you should always cater to an individuals preference over what a larger community thinks should happen. There is no “right” way to transition.

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