1. When she gave us the perfect motivation to get started with our not-quite-grown-up day.
GOOD MORNING. Do something mediocre today!
2. When she understood that no matter what, relationships will always come second to tacos.
3. When she acknowledged that living alone is completely terrifying, and sometimes you have to go to absurd lengths to ensure your own safety.
Home Alone style.
4. When she recognised that having pets is definitely better than having children, and probably better than having friends.
5. When she nailed how it feels to constantly deal with the pressure to live a healthy lifestyle.
G'morning! Just saw a pic of Halle Berry in a bra! Time to make a million smoothies and do some shame-mantras!
6. Because, let's be honest, the healthy lifestyle is the worst lifestyle.
*Thinks don't get a chicken club sandwich, Grace, get something healthier.* *Orders chicken caesar salad* *Only eats chicken and croutons*
Give me carbs or give me death.
7. And people trying to tell you that "exercise is good for you" and "you'll die if you don't exercise" are the actual worst.
I got from one place to another in LA today by walking. I feel unclean.
Can I please live?
8. When she demonstrated how wonderful it is to be able to order takeout whenever you want it, and no one can judge you.
9. When she totally understood the struggle of being trusted with a debit card and an internet connection.
Today I ate something called 'Sriracha Salad' & ordered a giant rattan flamingo from the internet. Apocalypse prep is underway!
So what if I want to go on Etsy and order a phone case that looks like a giant slice of pizza? I earned it.
10. Especially when you figure out that buying things wholesale from Amazon is a very real possibility.
11. When she understood that the not-quite-grown-up party is the best party.
I just ate my weight in brussel sprouts!!!! Chicago = partypartypartypartypartypartypartypartypartypartypartypartypartypartypartypartyparty
12. And the not-quite-grown-up hangover is definitely the best hangover.
I'm hungover in bed picking the marshmallows out of a box of Lucky Charms. TUESDAY FUNDAY.
13. When she accurately described how it feels to wake up the ~morning after~.
Good morning! You know it's going to be a good day when the first three things you say to yourself are "What?" "How?" "Why?"
14. But you still have to do adult things and pretend that you're a totally functional human being.
15. When she demonstrated that no matter how old you get, literally nothing will ever be funnier than dick jokes.
16. When she recognised that the most important thing to do when you do something grown up, like go to a doctor's appointment, is take a selfie.
17. When she understood that being trusted to maintain another life is just way too much effort.
18. When she congratulated herself for being an A+ adult.
Just found my mailbox key that I lost back in January. HOT DAMN THAT'S SOME KICK ASS ADULTING TODAY, SELF.
19. And celebrated the most important milestones.
Just followed Beyonce on instagram. TUESDAY. JUST. GOT. DIFFERENT.
20. When she kept up with the latest technological advances, and obviously looked really comfortable doing it.
21. When she seemed to have a creepy insight into your Google search history.
Today I've googled "can you eat spaghetti that's been the fridge for a week" and "the 10 commandments." I think I might be self actualizing.
22. When she just ~got~ what it's like to dress up for a fancy event and feel like you're totally out of place.
23. When she recognised that ignoring your responsibilities probably isn't the best way to go through life...
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
24. And adult responsibilities definitely have some advantages.
Why I can't have kids reason #87: I would tell them an airplane is called a 'toot tube' & anyone that corrects them can go straight to hell.
25. When she demonstrated that sometimes, you just have to be your own support system.
26. When her food shop was literally your food shop.
27. And when she refused to apologise for being 100% herself.
In a cab to my hotel in DC at 6am eating a turkey wrap and drinking a red bull. TAKE ME AS I AM.