The 19 Stages Of Drunk Eating

We’ve all been there.

1. 1. You decide it’s time to leave the bar

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2. 2. You make sure your friends are on board

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3. 3. Although it won’t matter, you’re not above going alone

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4. 4. Next you make the crucial decision of where to go

At this point you’ve already surrendered to the calories, so they better be MINDBLOWING.

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5. 5. And annoy whatever poor (and semi-creepy) soul is working at that hour

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6. 6. You order one of everything. Because you need it, really.

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7. 7. Then pay the bill…

Which will hurt worse tomorrow..

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8. 8. You impatiently wait in line while the food cooks

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9. 9. You accidentally (or blatantly) use too much of the hot sauce they warned you about

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10. 10. But still manage to ravage through every delicious bite


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11. 11. You have a moment of celebratory reflection

“That was absolutely the best meal I’ve ever eaten…EVER.”

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12. 12. Get home and pass out immediately

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13. 13. You wake up the next morning…

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14. 14. Quickly replay the way the evening unfolded

Oh no, did that really happen?! It wasn’t that bad, right?

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15. 15. Hate yourself

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16. 16. Drink a gallon of water


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17. 17. Ponder the gym…

The thought is excruciating

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18. 18. Quickly dismiss that idea

There’s absolutely no way.

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19. 19. Head to the nearest diner

Grease is the only cure for what you’re experiencing.

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