1. You can anticipate the judges' score within a tenth of a point.
2. You watch every program from each skater.
3. Figure skating has begun to bleed into your other hobbies.
4. You know the difference between an "axel" and a "butterfly."
5. You own a priceless piece of figure-skating history.
6. You begin to see figure skating everywhere you go.
7. Even though this girl handles it well, you are angry on her behalf.
8. You know that this is impossible.
9. You don't watch a movie until it comes out "on ice."
10. You don't trust any sports that don't involve glitter.
11. You resent amateurs cutting through the sacred middle space of a public rink.
12. You're the same thing for Halloween every year.
13. You can pronounce "salchow."
