1. Stage One: Satisfaction
What an enjoyable film! Let us linger for the anticipated post-credit teaser.
2. Stage Two: Superiority
Look at these dumb peasants, leaving their seats before the credits end.
3. Stage Three: Irritation
Nothing before the cut to the long scroll? Now we have to wait longer!?
4. Stage Four: Temptation
OMG I have to pee so bad my bladder is going to explode. Maybe we should go.
5. Stage Five: Distraction
Don’t think about it. Man a lot of people help make films. What does a grip even do?
6. Stage Six: Delirium
Hahaha that guy’s last name is Butts! Did you see that?
7. Stage Seven: Hope
There it is. The little weird globe symbol. They’re almost over. EVERYONE SHUT UP.
8. Stage Eight (A): Elation
DID YOU SEE THAT IT WAS THE BEST THING EVER TOTALLY WORTH WAITING!!1!
9. Stage Eight (B): Disappointment
That’s it? Seriously? We waited for that? Complete rip-off. Let’s go eat.
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