1.
Mermaids suck at hide-and-seek.
2.
Evidence suggests Ariel's mom was sleeping around.
3.
Evolution hates merfolk.
4.
King Triton secretly loves human things.
Exhibit A: Composition paper.
5.
King Triton is comically naive about human nature.
6.
Flounder is the most powerful wizard in Atlantica.
7.
Ursula is the real victim here.
8.
She's also the most body-positive character in this flick.
9.
But she failed Villain 101.
10.
Mermaids were the original BabelFish.
11.
Fish are too stupid to live.
12.
Grimsby is a horrible guardian.
13.
ARIEL IS WEARING HER SKIN AS A DRESS.
14.
This whole movie is an allegory for transgenderism.