dmaddox

david

David is some guy who studied English in college but likes to learn about just about everything. Current interests include beards, gnocchi, humus, sustainable things, and snarkyisms.

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  • A teddy bear taking a selfie
  • A wooden post sticking out of the grass
  • A rainbow unicorn with an arrow pointing upward for a horn
  • A little cowboy with a big 'number one' hat crying for joy
  • Moses wearing sunglasses holding a list article carved into a tablet
  • Clipboard with a piece of paper on it that says 'do it to em', 'get stuff done', and 'be a legend'
  • The number one hundred thousand under a small green monster
  • The number two hundred and fifty thousand under an alien
  • The number five hundred thousand amongst a forest of eyeballs
  • The number one million on the earth, being watched by a planet sized eyeball
  • A person with their palms facing forward, wearing an uncooked turkey on their head
  • Butterflies flying around a pair of lips
  • A body builder cat flexing with 2022 written across its pecs
  • Snow White smiling serenely while looking at a bird that is perched on her hand
  • The golden snitch flying through the air
  • A green slime splatter
  • K-pop 'finger heart'
  • Funky disco dancer
  • A cat looking startled to see a human dressed as a cat eating from its bowl, labelled "Karen"
  • Two slimy tentacles touching and forming a heart shape
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  • Help A Danish Mother/Babe Find Her Baby's Daddy

    If you happened to have been vacationing in Denmark about a year and a half ago and remember meeting a cute Danish girl named "Karen" at the in the Custom House Bar -- perhaps you shared some drinks and talked about "heuge" (sp??) -- at any rate, you ended up back at her place and in the morning, found it necessary to slip out quietly before she awoke... If that sounds vaguely familiar, well - you might need to watch this. You might also have an extreeemely cute baby son named August. Oh and PS, you're a dick.

  • Photoshop Contest - What Movie Were They Watching On Air Force One?

    Today The Huffington Post front-paged a photo of the White House staff on Air Force One enjoying some in-flight entertainment. The photo seems to indicate they were watching a movie with several naked bros in a cave. To answer the mystery of 'what they were *actually* watching, feel free to jump on over to the site (hint: it involves bipedal simains and a recently-deceased former President of the NRA 'damn'ing them 'all to hell'), but I think we can make this a little more interesting. What movies were do we think they were really watching on Air Force One? Submit answers below.

  • "Will You Have Sex With My 21-Year Old Down Syndrome Son?"

    Lucy Baxter is putting out an all-points-bulletin Booty Call to summon up a suitable mate (or "lady of the night") to de-virginize her 21-year old down syndrome son, Otto. She's looking to connect him with ladies into aspiring actors and like "ham pizza." Ladies, act now! This is a limited time offer.

  • Sri Lankan Suicide Bomber Attack Caught On Video

    A suicide attack in Sri Lanka that left 10 dead and 40 wounded at a Muslim community celebration was caught on tape by a Sri Lankan videographer. Apparently the attack "appeared to target six government ministers attending the community event, including the country's oil and telecommunications ministers." No humorous punch line here, folks. This is just terrible.

  • ApplySpace Makes Dating Applications for the Normally-Challenged.

    We've all seen the outdated "Application to Date My Daughter", but what if you could make one for yourself? ApplySpace's motto is "Making Dating Easier One Application At A Time," and they attempt to do just that- by allowing you to screen all of your potential suitors through some random personal questions. If you already have a boyfriend/girlfriend - take heart! ApplySpace also has applications for your very own Ninja or Pirate!

  • 16 Arrested at in Fight at Non-Violence Concert

    Police were called to intervene after a fight broke out at a benefit for a local non-violence charity in Maryland, leaving behind only irony so sweet it will give you indigestion.

  • A Message to the "Lost Generation"

    A very interesting video with an encouragingly hopeful message to the artistic and idealistic "Millennial Generation", which many disenchanted Baby Boomers are calling "lost", "confused", and "self-obsessed." For the record I think both sides are probably right, but this video's message is something that we all need to hear.

  • "We're Going in the Hudson" Redux!

    Some computer simulated plane-on-Hudson river action! No, it's really just a re-enactment of the emergency landing of Flight 1549 on the shores of Manhattan Island, but a darn good one. Via BoingBoing.

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