I just went to a zine store the other day. There’s a whole store for zines. How does something like that survive the internet, which is essentially a giant, unedited, anonymous zine? Zine.

Is it possible for a book to have herpes? Because if it is, I bet this book would have herpes.

I keep reading the title as “Dumbest Shits At The Glenn Beck Rally.” Works either way.

Looks like someone dipped his hair in the douchepool.

The only way that could work is if you chew it with your urethra.

How about “Sapphic Sumo Smacks Same Sex-Ex After She Signals Sassy Opp-Sex Single in Snickers Suit”?

When did Craig Kilborn start a band?

But their genitals are all at different levels. And if you translate their genital’s positions onto sheet music (using Jack as middle C, of course), you’ll clearly see the melody of the song “Calendar Girl.”  I just solved Lost.

I’m pretty sure that’s a young John C. McGinley from Scrubs.

Michael Bay is exceptionally good at directing robots. Zing!