The 45 Most Important Lessons We Learned In 2012

2012 was inarguably the most important year in human history. Here’s what we’ve learned.

1. Leonard DiCaprio is actually a housewife from the 1950s named Judy Zipper:

2. It’s never a good a idea to put socks on a dog:

3. 850. That’s how many:

4. The “Spiderman-swinging-out-of-your-butt” look is never a good look:

5. Honey Boo Boo’s mom looks remarkably like Slimer from “Ghostbusters:”

6. That missing Dorito is always where you least expected:

7. There is literally nothing funnier than a dog getting hit in the crotch by a tennis ball:

8. Always be confident in your handshake:

9. There’s no point in ever taking another roller coaster picture again, because this is the best:

10. It’s never a good thing when Facebook thinks you’re a knee:

11. The cat selfie is the new hot selfie:

12. Or maybe the sassy monkey selfie:

13. Or maybe the horse selfie:

14. Or maybe the lawn mower selfie:

15. The guy who named Jet Skis “Jet Skis” really messed up:

Revelation by nice_mustard.

16. Adrian Brody is the white Snoop Dogg:

17. How to spell “cologne”:

18. And “bottle”:

19. A good way to stay in shape is to bench-press a goose:

20. If you’re German and planning on cannonballing into a pool of ice, THINK AGAIN:

21. Robert Nelsen is one cool dude:

22. Donald Trump and Bill O’Reilly have never heard of the wave:

23. This is the right way to eat a Tic Tac:

24. You can be stylish, but chances are you’re also illegal:

25. All cats just want to report the weather:

26. And all carrots just want to model:

27. Gary Busey is what’s wrong with the country’s education system:

28. Justin Bieber with a tiny face is equal parts hilarious and terrifying:

29. Dressing a horse as Harry Potter is ALWAYS a good idea:

30. The scientific name for dogs is “Poop Factory”:

31. Somehow, somewhere, this picture of Sir Patrick Stewart happened:

32. Bears just want to say hi:

33. This is the best name you can give a death metal band:

34. Jon Stewart’s pen-flip game is ON POINT:

35. Every time Vladimir Putin walks away from something, it looks like it’s going to blow up:

36. Reading “Fifty Shades Of Grey” in public is also NEVER a good look:

37. Treadmills are a waste of time:

38. All dogs are terrified of Julia Roberts:

40. Me, you, and everyone else will never be as cool as this man:

41. It’s never a good idea to pick your nose during the Olympics:

42. Nic Cage looks great as a cat:

43. Dating sites can be terrifying:

44. Steve Carrell and Ryan Gosling definitely had a child together:

45. And seals should escape from the zoo more often. Like, every day:

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