33 Reasons Why Aliens Will Never Talk To Us

Not going to happen.

1. Because of people like this:

2. And tattoos like this:

3. Because of shirts like this:

4. Because we still need to figure out our own geography before we take on the universe:

5. Because of our strange, strange mating rituals:

6. And because of people unaware of what a medical emergency is:

7. Because of relationships like this:

8. And relationships like this:

9. And people looking for relationships like this:

10. Because we’re still so scientifically behind:

11. And because videos like this have over 200,000 views:

12. Because our kids don’t stand a chance:

13. And because we still don’t know how to protect ourselves from the weather:

14. Because of people like this:

15. Because of people who need to show the world their hands:

16. And questions like this:

17. Because of people who eat mayonnaise like this:

18. And people who eat like this:

19. Because of babies named “Hashtag”:

20. And stuff like this:

21. Because of people who have no idea how escalators work:

22. Because of ‘grams like this:

23. Because of tattoos like this:

24. Because of updates like this:

26. Because of stuff like this:

27. And streets named like this:

28. Because of people who can’t read:

29. And ink like this:

30. Because of shirts like this:

31. And sandals like this:

32. Because of people who have no idea how time works:

33. But mostly because of people like this:

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