Washington, D.C. Is The Worst During A Snowstorm
When it snows even the tiniest amount in Washington, D.C., the entire city shuts down. In wintertime, there’s really sNOw worse place to be.
So it’s a Monday night in Washington, D.C. You’re winding down for the evening, maybe checking out the 11 o’clock news to see what Topper Shutt has to say about the weekday forecast.
And then you see it.
5. The storm even has a funny name! If it’s got a funny name, it has to be a big deal!
6. You run to the local Giant Food. You grab all the milk and bread and toilet paper you can.
7. Remember: Once the snow hits, there will be NO way to get milk and bread and toilet paper ever again. You must hoard as much as you can right now.
8. Then you drive to the gas station. There will also never be gasoline in the D.C. area ever again. Fill up immediately. Your local news media URGES you to.
10. You go home. You turn on the TV. The snow will be here SOON.
11. Then you see the magic words: School: Cancelled! The government: Closed!
12. You even start planning your big snowball fight! Conditions permitting? Ha! This storm is gonna be huge!
13. The final weather predictions come in. Oh boy oh boy oh boy! Look at all those colors!
And then, just as they promised on TV: Snow starts to fall!
IT’S WINTER MAGIC!!!
18. Look at that storm move! It’s beautiful. My goodness, it’s beautiful!!!
19. Wait, hold up. What are they doing on TV? Are they shoveling water?
21. Is it seriously just raining outside? Again?! How do we fall for this every freaking time???
23. No, wait wait, there’s a new update! It’s still coming! Oh, thank you, THANK YOU, weather overlords. It’s still coming.
29. Wait, is this snow ever coming? It HAS to come! They promised us this time!
#Snowquester is a bust at #PBS #SnowAngels http://t.co/A2Kk8hn7gC
— Natalie Nicole (@Benson_Natalie) 06 Mar 2013
35. And then comes the inevitable: Just hours after they promised tons of snow, the weather guys start backing off their predictions for D.C.
37. But since it’s basically just raining, at least your Beltway commute won’t be horrifying, right?
39. At least there’s some good news, though: That “snow day” gave us this adorable panda photo.
So, whatever. It was all worth it, D.C.
And here’s to many more winter weather freakouts in 2013!
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permagrin 2 months agoFall for it? We are all in on it! Come on folks if you haven’t already figured it out schools close, government shuts down and we all get to “telecommute”. If freaking out over hyped weather is what it takes for this grown man to get the coveted afternoon nap, so be it. And seriously, we know you are from a super cold place where it snows a lot and you are rough and tough and we are wimps….wimps taking afternoon naps suckas.
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akatobi2002 2 months agoDC is the best!
Once the Federal Gov’t shuts down, all surrounding counties follow suit,
it’s the best. -
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lynettemarieh 2 months agoWeather people get everyone in a stupid panic for nothing. Pathetic you guys still fall for it.
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elizabeths26 2 months agoWhere I come from (Southwestern Ontario, surrounded by the Great Lakes) we don’t call “Snow Day” until it’s colder than 30 below with winds of at least 40 miles per hour and over 2 feet of snow. Anything less than that is just a typical winter’s day.
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Glitterbabe 2 months ago
Living in NOVA & being from the Midwest….I laugh my head off at these people all winter long. At the idea of snow, everything shuts down. We went to Best Buy this morning & they were gearing up to close down due to inclement weather, & all the employees were baffled that we were out. I was amused & all until I tried to go to 3 different Starbucks & they had all shut down minutes before I got there. Damn, guys, I just wanted a hazelnut macchiato. Stop being such pansies. I almost want to go back to Michigan after this lol
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patticake1601 2 months agoYou know why people freak out and hoard toilet paper, water and gas? Because whenever we get the slightest weather event we all lose power!!! The last huge storm was the “derecho” last year and hundreds of thousand lost power including hundreds of businesses. Could you find a gas station open the next day? NO!! None of them had power so it was impossible to fill up. I live in MD, 35 mins from DC and yes they freak out here when you get a snowflake on the ground, but it is because PEPCO is so freaking unreliable and so slow in returning power to everyone. BG&E and Dominion are better but when you lose power for a week at a time you learn for the next time.
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tanak 2 months ago
LOL. Lived there three years in the 90s, and my memories are filled with winters that were below freezing, ice on power lines, and sliding cars on all-seasons on the hilly roads around Fort Myer. Winters in Seattle were the same circus, every year… $50K SUVs on ASRs in the ditches. :P
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Sarah Sage 2 months ago
Everyone was freaking out Monday and Tuesday at work, but luckily another Chicago native was there to help calm everyone down with me. We assured everyone that in 40 degrees, there would be no chance of 2 feet of accumulation. Or, any accumulation. …I think tomorrow I’ll suggest we start our own weather service called Chill the Fuck Out. Yes.
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