2. Inside this box is the best, purest, most amazing substance on Earth. It is not merely a spice. It transcends spice. It is insulted by the label “spice.”
3. This is Old Bay Seasoning we’re talking about here. It is perfection. If there is a God, Old Bay is proof that God obviously spent his/her formative years somewhere near the Chesapeake Bay.
4. Do you know what Old Bay goes great on? It tastes amazing on chips.
7. Have you ever put Old Bay on french fries or potato wedges before? If not, prepare yourself, because you’re about to have your MIND BLOWN.
8. It’s great when you’re cooking on the grill.
10. And it’s best of all on crabs. Old Bay with crabs is a magical experience. Words cannot describe it.
11. Maybe you’re thinking, “Couldn’t I just sprinkle some salt and pepper and paprika on my food? Won’t that be pretty much the same thing as Old Bay?”
12. And the answer is: NO, OF COURSE NOT. Old Bay is made in a factory with, like, fairy dust or something. It is amazing and cannot be recreated by mere man.
13. This is the kind of spice you give that special someone on Valentine’s Day. Or hand out as party favors.
17. And you’re just as hardcore as ever about it. You crave its scent. You long for that feeling you get when it hits your tongue.
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