Police Blotter Reports From Atherton, California

Where the average house goes for $4 million, making it one of the richest towns in America. The residents seem a tad paranoid.

1.

A BLUE van? That's very non-religious.

2.

Fucking writers.

3.

Waiter? Blackjack dealer? Groom?

4.

Probably the guy above in the black pants and white dress shirt.

5.

SOMETHING IS NOT WHERE IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE...

6.

Probably the beginning of a robbery tunnel.

7.

The person who compiles these reports for the Mercury News obviously has a sense of humor.

8.

Yes, because burglars are well known to whistle while casing.

9.

I need to know what the hawk was eating.

See 10 more thrilling reports from Atherton here.

Via: Gawker.