13 Ads That Are Assholes

My old ad profs said “the best ads have a personality.” Well, these ads are all real jerks.

1.

The definition of “je ne sais quoi,” according to the Oxford 20-volume dictionary set that sits behind my desk: “an indescribable or inexpressible something.”
That something, here, is ASSHOLE.

2.

Ad via Germany.
Porsche drivers already have “asshole” tag problems.
This ad just makes it that much worse.

3.

There are a lot of asshole car ads.
I’ll keep to to two for this post.
I bought whoever bought it was an asshole.

4.

This Reebok ad via Germany doesn’t even try to hide its asshole-ness one bit.

5.

Calling any investment ad an “asshole” these days is like calling an asshole an “asshole.” However, this particular ad is really an asshole.

6.

I really hate to pick on a world-destroying firm like Morgan Stanley…
These ads are from 2008, right on the middle of the financial collapse.
The copy starts: “If you look closely, you’ll see one is a white-bearded goat and the other a balloon.”
Well, that sure is some extraordinary worldly wiseness. So…are you guys the goat or the balloon? Are you suggesting that I invest in livestock? Rubber? Ocean exploration?
Fuck you, asshole ads.

7.

Ad for the New York, New York Hotel and Casino in Vegas.
It features the most egregious misuse of the word “All” in ad history.
ASSHOLE.

8.

At first glance, this Starbuck’s ad doesn’t appear to be an asshole.
But, when you realize they placed it on the corner of Houston and Lafayette in NYC — where there isn’t a backyard for miles — ASSHOLE.

9.

YES, legalize mari… asshole.

10.

I’ve been on the fence about these obnoxious Frito-Lay ads for two years.
On one hand, they’re kind of clever.
But on the other…
Yeah, I just fell off the fence. The ads are ASSHOLES.

11.

“Viral” video via Ray-Ban.
How do you justify charging people 4-5 times more for the same exact sunglasses?
By showing a cow giving birth to a be-sunglassed ASSHOLE.

12.

“This is the car you buy because you can’t buy a bald eagle.”
Fuck you, ASSHOLE Dodge ad.

13.

This Ken Cole billboard stunk up the entire west side of Manhattan for weeks with the smell of ASSHOLE.

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