1. When you started following someone on Twitter just because their default picture made you salivate.
2. And then stalked them on Instagram just so you could temporarily quench your thirst.
3. When you woke up from an insanely steamy dream about someone who is “just a friend.”
4. And then you couldn’t stop thinking about what your subconscious was doing to them ALL DAY.
5. When you went to the grocery store and undressed nearly everyone with your eyes.
7. When you noticed how much you’re constantly grooming your thirst area.
Because your thirstiness is unpredictable.
8. When literally everything around you began to remind you of sex.
9. The thirst was NEVER more real when you realized you NEVER swiped left on Tinder.
10. So you had to delete it completely from your phone because you were addickted.
Only to reinstall it again.
11. When the fact sunk in that you didn’t have an office crush…
…You had multiple office crushes.
Like basically everyone in your office.
12. When you started to fantasize about your celebrity crush.
13. And ALL of the fictional characters they have ever played throughout their career.
14. When you went out with your friends to have a good time…
…But you ended up leaving your friends halfway through the night for some random eye candy that you just met.
15. When you completely went out of your way just to talk to someone hot.
16. And didn’t stop flirting when you found out they were already taken.
Because they need to know they have options.
17. When you began to find one of your friend’s parents attractive.
18. And you couldn’t stop stalking their Facebook page.
Like you totally wouldn’t mind becoming your friend’s new step-parent.
19. When you got a dog just so you could find your next target at the dog park.
20. And then you had to get rid of it because you only have time to tend to your thirst.
21. But you never truly realized how deep you were into your thirstysomethings until your friends started to introduce you as their “thirsty friend.”
- [A Harris County, Texas, sheriff's deputy was ambushed Friday night when a man walked up and repeatedly shot him from behind. ›] (http://www.buzzfeed.com/jimdalrympleii/sheriffs-deputy-shot-dead-in-ambush-at-texas-gas-station)
- [Dominica Prime Minister Roosevelt Skerrit said that Tropical Storm Erika killed 20 people there, and set the island back 20 years from the damage. ›] (http://www.buzzfeed.com/stephaniemcneal/at-least-5-people-are-missing-after-tropical-storm-erika-thr)
- [Police are investigating the death of Jamycheal Mitchell, who was arrested months ago in Virginia for allegedly stealing about $5 worth of groceries. He was found dead in his jail cell last week. ›] (http://www.buzzfeed.com/jimdalrympleii/black-man-held-for-months-for-stealing-5-worth-of-snacks-fou)