Every year, Halloween ends and ~some people~ feel as if they have THE RIGHT to start playing Christmas music.
LIKE THEY ARE OVERLOOKING THE GREATEST HOLIDAY AMERICA HAS TO OFFER:
1. First and foremost, the whole point of the holiday is to just eat. LIKE THAT'S ALL YOU'RE RESPONSIBLE FOR DOING THE WHOLE HOLIDAY.
2. And JUST THE THOUGHT of Thanksgiving food is enough is to get excited about.
3. Because between turkey and mashed potatoes, Thanksgiving has the BEST food any holiday has to offer.
4. And pumpkin pie? WHEN HAS YOUR MOUTH EVER BEEN MORE WET?
And STOP appropriating my pie, CHRISTMAS.
5. And then after you're done eating, you're actually ENCOURAGED to sleep.
6. And if ~sleeping~ isn't for you, you can just relax on the couch while you watch some Thanksgiving Day football.
7. Unlike Christmas, you aren't constantly living in nostalgia the whole day while having HUGE expectations for the holiday.
8. Unlike Easter, you aren't wasting your time looking around your house for some damn painted eggs.
9. And unlike MOST holidays, you don't have to buy ANYTHING for ANYONE.
10. Plus, there's no pressure to get holidrunk THE WHOLE HOLIDAY WEEKEND like on Halloween.
11. And like how fuckin' cool is it that every year there's a GIANT ASS PARADE with GIANT ASS BALLOONS that just float through New York City?
12. AND SEXY MATT LAUER NARRATES IT ALL FOR YOU.
13. Oh and DON'T GET ME STARTED on those hand turkeys. Like those are SA'KEWT.
14. And Thanksgiving break? A WHOLE WEEK OFF FROM SCHOOL JUST TO PREPARE YOU TO EAT?
15. Not to mention the holiday is totally customizable to your preferences. Like you can even do what's called a "Friendsgiving."
16. Or you can totally make it vegetarian and veg-the-fuck-out on all the Tofurkey YOU WANT.
17. And when the holiday is all said and done, it's all about giving thanks and being grateful for what you have.
So give some thanks for Thanksgiving this year and tell Christmas TO SIT THE FUCK DOWN.
