1. Paul Shaffer
You know, that guy that does the music on the David Letterman show? He’s bald, and uh…kind of dresses weird?
2. Nicole Scherzinger
….uhm, she was in the Pussy Cat Dolls and then she judged some show, I think? I don’t know, though, she just kept giving me this look, like she was real bored.
3. Bruce Jennings
This guy seems like the one that you’d most likely run into, of the Kardashian bunch. But that doesn’t make the story any better.
4. Ann Romney
Not to rub salt in the wounds, but the only way we’d see Mrs. Romney is as her waitstaff.
5. Any of the America’s Next Top Model models
Oh, you know, she was the one that freaked out when they cut her hair! Remember? I think she did a hair commercial once!
6. The guy that replaced Eric Forman on That 70’s Show
He didn’t quite live up to the role. But wait—bonus points if you tell your story listeners that he’s Seth Myers’ brother! Little known fact for the win!
7. Ann Veal