1.
"Release me from this bow! It's not even meant for hair."
4.
"No brush? Then I'm going full Donald Trump today."
5.
"OBEY? Pshh, yeah right."
6.
"Am I so big because I'm full of secrets?"
7.
"... or because I haven't been washed in forever?!"
8.
"I forgot what water felt like!"
9.
"I'm gonna attack your face now."
10.
"It's the forehead's turn!"
11.
"Ha! A beanie can't hold me back."
13.
"Ah, yes. The Teen Mom 2 look: flat-ironed bangs surrounded by curls."
14.
"Pompadour? Pompadon't."
16.
"I just want to feel shampoo again."
17.
"This is what days of product buildup looks like, people."
18.
"Business in the middle, party on the sides. I'm a greasy, modern mullet!"
20.
"Were you recently electrocuted, Harry?"
21.
"Oh. A turban-bandana situation? This is new."
22.
"So, this is a thing we're doing now."
23.
"I don't know if I like it."
24.
"Definitely don't like it. Crawling out of it."
25.
"Oh great, free again. Let's get crazy!"
26.
"OK, OK. I'll behave."
27.
"Man bun. Is this a punishment?"