1. When they decided to wear matching denim suits.
2. When Nicole supported Paris’ tiara phase.
Sorry, Paris, that was NOT hot.
3. Their friendship with Kim Stewart.
4. When they, along with Nicky Hilton, were soooo metal.
Clearly Nicole was not really feeling the sign of the horns.
5. When Paris thought it was a good idea to bring her poor dog everywhere.
So NOT hot, Paris.
6. When they walked the pink carpet alongside a Texas Longhorn for the premiere of The Simple Life 2.
7. When Nicole made this “sexy” pose for the camera.
8. When they hosted the 2004 Teen Choice Awards.
It so was NOT hot.
9. When Paris and Mariah Carey had a “good side” standoff while posing for a photo.
Sorry, Paris, Nicole clearly won the standoff.
10. When Paris and Johnny Knoxville had an intellectual conversation about a U.S. foreign policy. Wait, scratch that, it was probably about where the after party was at.
Nicole is not feeling this conversation.
11. When they supported JC Chasez’s solo career.
Never forget Schizophrenic.
12. When they thought it was a good idea to party with Andy Dick.
Also, Paris flashed a lot of side boob and some nipple. NOT hot.
13. When Paris wore these flared Juicy cargo sweat pants — with Uggs, of course.
I see you laughing at her, Nicole.
14. When Nicole didn’t stop the unholy frosted-tipped relationship between Nick Carter and Paris.
15. When Paris pondered if it really was “chicken or fish,” when posing with Jessica Simpson and OutKast.
16. When Paris tried to work those 7 For All Mankind jeans.
That’s NOT so hot, Paris.
17. When they posed with Jason Bateman.
Why Jason, why?!
18. And finally, when they hung out with The Anna Nicole Show’s Bobby Trendy.
I mean if they were going to pose with anybody from the show, other than Anna Nicole of course, it should’ve been Sugar Pie.