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17 Fanny Packs From The ’90s And What They Said About You

Everyone knows that when it came to elementary school social norms, not all fanny packs were created equal.

1. The Simpsons

What it said about you: Your parents had no idea what you were watching on TV.

2. Beverly Hills, 90210

What it said about you: You thought you were soooo cool and mature, but, in reality, you had no idea what the hell you were watching.

3. JanSport

What it said about you: You settled for nothing but the best, and also your parents were scared of your temper tantrums.

4. EastSport

What it said about you: You asked for JanSport and got this instead.

5. Mickey Mouse

What it said about you: This was a hand-me-down you got from your mom (that she probably ordered from the Disney catalog).

Tommy Hilfiger

What it said about you: You knew you were the one the fashionable cool kids on the playground! Haters to the left.

6. Body Glove

What it said about you: You not only were one of the cool kids, but other kids’ parents thought you were maybe a “little to mature to be hanging around with their kids,” which meant no birthday party invitation for you.

7. Goosebumps

What it said about you: You were a book nerd, but a book nerd with good taste.

8. Nike: Air Jordan

What it said about you: Your parents were OK on dropping $100-plus on shoes for you — or at least you wished they were.

9. Nintendo Game Boy

What it said about you: You were an easy target for thieves. I mean, everyone knew what you were carrying in your fanny pack.

10. Barney

What it said about you: If you were caring this around after first grade, you were probably a target to get your ass kicked.

11. MasterCard

What it said about you: Your grandparents regifted the free fanny pack they got from MasterCard.

12. The Lion King

What it said about you: You were OBSESSED with this movie and there was a good chance that there was a worn-out VHS copy of the film in your family’s VCR that was permanently stuck there. Oh well, hakuna matata!

13. New Kids on the Block

What it said about you: Your parents were silently ignoring your more-than-borderline obsession with New Kids on the Block. And, your bedroom was a shrine to all things NKOTB.

14. Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers

What it said about you: You were a total badass who was practicing karate fight moves on your younger siblings. Team Green Ranger 4 life!

15. Niagara Falls

What it said about you: You begged, BEGGED your parents to get this for you on your family vacation. It seemed really cool at the time, but now you regret the purchase, deeply.

16. Hard Rock Café

What it said about you: You wanted to tell all the jealous bitches that you ate at the oh-so-cool Hard Rock Café while on your family vacation in Orlando, Fla. Although, you were probably trying to keep secret the fact that you only went to SeaWorld and Universal Studios because your parents were too cheap to pay for Disney World tickets.

17. Newport Cigarettes

What it said about you: Your parents smoked, a lot. But hey, at least they were alive with pleasure.

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