1.
First things first, learn the national anthem.
2.
And then become accustomed to the local language. Do not be offended. Just embrace it.
3.
Learn that our proverbs are probably very different than those you're used to.
6.
Know immediately that there is a secret, great level of disdain directed towards tourists by Australians.
7.
And we don't take kindly to thieves, either.
8.
Know the origins of this great country well.
9.
And be prepared for the consequences of living in a paradise 99% of the time.
10.
Read the (Australian) bible.
12.
Be a good, Australian parent.
13.
And throw some great Aussie kid's parties with this handy walkthrough.
15.
Figure out when and how to get yourself a great deal.
16.
And don't be afraid to question some of the things in Australia.
17.
Get the whole "laidback Aussie" thing down.
18.
Learn to love Australian news issues. Like when we tried to kill Johnny Depp's dogs.
20.
And embrace the shit out of Milo.
21.
Learn the local jingles.
22.
And above all, don't ask dumb questions.
