1. "I'll be there in a sec." - There's no way I'm going to make it on time.
2. "She's alright." - I would sleep with her.
3. "Not bad." - Quite good.
4. "He's such a nice guy." - I wish I were dating him / he's out of my league / I'm out of his
5. "Wanna go to the local?" - I can't think of anything else to do.
6. "Yeh right." = I understand.
7. "Do you guys want a coffee?" – I'm asking because it would be rude. otherwise…BUT u better ask me next time you go.
8. "I haven't spoken to him/her in ages!" - I hate that person and never want to talk to them again.
9. "I'll be there." - I'll think about it.
10. "Cool." - I'm not interested in your story but I'm pretending I am.
11. "Sure thing mate." - Piss off and leave me alone.
12. "How much?!" - I'll probably still pay that amount.
13. "Affordable." -You could live here, but you really REALLY don't want to.
14. "Wonderfully priced." - There's a reason it's so cheap.
15. "Cozy." - Shit hole.
16. "Retro." - There may be mold on the walls.
17. "Sydney is so expensive." - I can't afford to live in the city but I wish I could.
18. "That's so Melbourne." - That's so fucking pretentious.
19. "Perth." - Some place I've never been.
20. "I'm gonna spend a weekend in Canberra." – I have to spend the weekend in Canberra.
21. "Tasmania was great." – Tasmania was cold but beautiful
22. "Mate." - I'm not friends with you and I don't want to be.
23. "Sorry." – Impulsively saying sorry, I don't mean it.
24. "Sorry mate." – I'm saying sorry because I should not because I want too.
25. "Maaaate." – Seriously dude?
26. "Open 9-5." - Open 9ish to 5ish.
27. ."Train delayed due to track work." - The train is running late. No one knows why.
28. "I hate public transport." - I had a bad morning.
29. "I love politics!" – Something about the current government irritates me and I like telling people.
30. "It's so cold outside." - I'm upset that I can't wear shorts.
31. "It's so hot…wanna go to the beach?" – I'm really pale at the moment and should work on a tan.
32. "Beautiful weather right?" - I have no interest in holding a conversation with you.
33. "Hotel." - Pub.
34. "I'm not racist but..." – I'm about to say something racist.
35. "I'll pay you back when I get paid." - You are never getting your money.
36. "Lets go out tonight." - Lets stay at home drinking a lot until we decide not to go out because it's too far.
37. "RSVP." - You're gonna have to put on a shirt.
38. "I love it when..." - I definitely DO NOT love it when you do that.
39. "Yeh, okay, text it to me." - If you text it to me it will be much easier to ignore.
40. "I prefer to..." - Here's what we're gonna do.
41. "Whatever." - That hurt.
42. "I'm happy." - I'm content.
43. "Game of two halves." - We lost.
44. "How good was that?" - I'm not asking you, I know it was good. Agree with me.
45. "Fair Dinkum?" - Oh really? Also, I am over the age of 50.
46. "You're such a bogan." - You are, without a doubt, a terrible person.
47. "Wanna root?" - I have never, nor shall I ever, have sex.
48. "Brunch." - Mid-morning drinks.
49. "Picnic." - Midday drinks.
50. "Afternoon tea." - Mid-afternoon drinks.
51. "BYO." - Unless you provide your own alcohol you won't be drinking.
52. "I'm gonna chuck a sickie." - Beach day!
53. "It'll be done by next Tuesday." - I'll have it ready in two months.
54. "Bastard!" - I love you.
55. "I'm in Woop Woop." - I have no idea where I am.