61 Thoughts Everyone Has While Shopping In General Pants

“Everyone who works here looks like they should be on an early ‘90s MTV commercial.”

1.This place looks intimidating.
2.I literally have no clothes like this.
3.Headless models. Bold.
4.So many graphics on the windows.
5.Smells like incense and…candles?
6.Ah, yes, there’s a candle. Oh cool it looks like a skull.
7.It’s $40.00
8.Won’t be getting that…

9.Everyone that works here looks like they should be on an early ’90s MTV commercial.
10.When did NFL jerseys become a thing?
11.Thanks Miley, I guess.
12.How am I meant to get around this place?
13.This shirt is white. It costs $60.
14.No, no, no don’t talk to me.
15.I’m fine, don’t talk to me.
16.This looks like they’ve raided the Fresh Prince’s wardrobe.
17.But I want it.
18.I don’t know why.
19.These shorts are $70.
20.Why are jean shorts just as expensive as jeans?
21.That makes no sense. None. It’s less denim?
22.”Let me put that in a change room for you…”
23.What…but…I can’t afford…
24.”Okay that’d be great.”
25.Oh God now I have to try them on.

26.I’ll keep looking though.
27.Wait those pants have no pockets…who would buy those.
28.*Notices staff wearing them.*
29.Oh, okay.
30.A lot of black clothes in here…
31.And Nikes and jeans. That’s a thing now.
32.I feel so old in here.
33.Am I really that disconnected?
34.I used to be cool.
35.I swear by it…I was…
36.And now, look at me.
37.No. No I’m still cool.
38.It’s these guys that have gone too far.
39.These shoes have holes in them.
40.Why is that model wearing so many shirts?
41.Everything I like is over $100.
42.Everything.
43.These socks are FIFTEEN DOLLARS.
44.The fabric on all their clothes is so…thin.
45.That’s probably why all their models are wearing five shirts.
46.Some of these things are WAY too close to Bieber clothes.
47.Bucket hats? When did that happen?
48.My dad doesn’t even wear bucket hats.
49.Santa Cruz is still a thing?

Getty Images / Kevin Winter

50.I better go try on those shorts.
51.Wait, why? I didn’t want them. They’re so expensive.
52.Oh but she DID put them in the changing room.
53.She was totally flirting with me.
54.No. No definitely not.
55.She’s just trying to make a sale.
56.Man these shorts look cool.
57.Or maybe I’ve just spent so long in here that I believe that?
58.Whatever. I don’t need them.
59.”How did you like the shorts?”
60.”Oh! They’re great! Loved ‘em! I’ll grab them.”
61.Fuck.

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