1. Step 1: Be a football fan. (A fan of the Washington State Cougars, in this case.)
2. Step 2: Watch your team get blown out (Washington State lost tonight to Stanford 55-17) and become increasingly depressed.
3. Step 3: Give up completely on football, dignity, and the entire concept of civilized society and just dump a giant plastic sack of popcorn on your face because it’s easier than using your hands to eat.
“Fuck this shit.” —Washington State Popcorn Guy
4. We’ve all been there.
9. Stay safe tonight, Washington State Popcorn Guy.
- A University of Cincinnati officer has been charged with murder for shooting Samuel Dubose, an unarmed black man.
- Mullah Omar, the Taliban's reclusive leader, died more than two years ago, Afghan officials say. The Taliban hasn't commented.
- Debris found on an island in the Indian Ocean belongs to the same type of aircraft as the missing Malaysia Airlines flight, a U.S. official told the Associated Press.