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We spend our days travelling round the world trying our hand at the local dialect. So we really appreciate it when restaurants offer a helping hand to us English speakers, even if they get it wrong sometimes…

1.

If this is real chicken, what was that we just ate?

2.

Chocolate Puke. Sold.

3.

Because that’s not how you expect your dinner to behave.

4.

Think we’ll pass, not the biggest fan of Herpes.

5.

How else do you expect your food to be steamed?

6.

We would prefer not.

7.

Anyone ever heard of an ashamed potato?

8.

It’s always good to have a choice of nonsense, most places aren’t so considerate.

9.

They sell it well.

10.

Now come on is that really fair?

11.

At least they realised that’s not how God fillet is usually served.

12.

As opposed to old ass meat?

13.

You’ve got to be careful everywhere these days.

14.
Cathy Moscardini

A pair of smelly what? Smelly furnace acid mutton soup is that?

15.

All we can say is we are spoilt for choice.

16.

We like to know what sounds our food makes.

17.

Oh but we prefer our Grandmas plain.

18.
Hannah Bolton

How do they even make that?

19.

Will eating this turn us a walking talking Wikipedia page?

20.

So that’s what Bubble Tea is.

21.

It can’t taste as bad as it smells, can it?

22.
Hannah Bolton

A kind of cherry potato fusion? We’ve never heard of them.

23.

Hopefully the cheese bacon mushroom face didn’t get too badly injured.

24.

Oh but we’re not a fan, so we will pass on that.

25.

For decisions made easier.

26.

Please, no more spicy relatives.

27.

Since when did soup get discriminatory?

28.
Lizzie Moscardini

Food envy anyone?

30.

We are all for experimenting with sauces but really?

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