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1. You keep hitting the snooze button.
2. It's just too hard to get out of bed...
3. ...and it's even harder to get other people out of your bed.
4. You move slow because you didn't get enough sleep...
5. ...and because you're always a little hungover.
6. You can't stop singing in the shower...
7. ...or stop doing whatever else you do in the shower.
8. You spend too much time preparing breakfast...
9. ...and even more time eating it.
10. You have an extensive, unchangeable morning routine...
11. ...and you can never decide what to wear.
12. You can't leave your house without repeatedly making sure you have everything you need.
13. The traffic is insane...
14. ...and something always goes wrong with your car.
15. You can't go up to your office without coffee...
16. ...but the line at Starbucks doesn't move...
17. ...and they never make your drink right.
18. The office elevator takes forever!
19. Then you prolong the walk into the office...
20. ...because you have awkward sexual tension with a few co-workers...
21. ...and you dread seeing your boss.
22. Your job's not essential, anyway, so why should you be on time?
23. Whatever -- you're not late; the clocks at work just run early.
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