What Will Happen If We Let Gay People Get Married

Brace yourself.

1. First, gay people will get married

2. …then gay dogs are going to get married

3. Cats will think gay dog weddings are rad and they’ll start being gay

4. Then sloths will go gay

5. The sun is probably going to get all gay with another sun

6. But then the moon is going to get the wrong impression and try to move in with us

7. Which of course will lead to the first of many Apocalypses

8. Sensing weakness in the human race, Gorillas will finally overthrow us

9. They will force us to exclusively produce movies starring Brendan Fraser. OH THE HUMANITY

Frazer Harrison / Getty Images

10. If you let gay people marry each other, your kids will grow up to be timeshare salesmen… and they’ll have bees instead of fingers

Justin Sullivan / Getty Images

11. You’ve been warned…

David Handschuh-Pool / Getty Images

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