23 Reasons Why John Stanton Should Be On The Hill’s Most Beautiful People List

Let us count the ways.

1. He is 9 feet tall.

2. He can pull off a golfers cap quite well.

He also looks great in a cowboy hat.


And DC LOVES him.

4. That marvelous goatee!

5. He is great with kids.

6. He knows how to express himself.

7. Lawmakers love him.

8. He knows how to twerk on his co-workers.

9. He knows how to light the shit out of some fireworks.

10. He can appreciate the finer things in life.

11. Most of what he wears has a skull on it.

12. He looks fancy in an A-shirt.

13. He knows how to chill.

14. He is a world traveler.

15. He wore this necklace.

16. He loves dogs.


17. He loves sunsets.

And appreciates all nature

18. He can drink with the best of them.

Especially if it’s Senator Gillibrand.

19. He met President Obama…

…then he ate this with him.

20. He holds alligators for fun.

21. He shoots poison darts.

With his face painted like this.

22. He is great at selfies.

23. He LOVES the holidays.

Even on MSNBC.

And so we humbly nominate John Stanton for The Hill’s 50 Most Beautiful List

Because if he doesn’t make the list, HE WILL FIND YOU.

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