1. London wages seem a lot, but then you factor in how much it costs to buy a simple vodka orange centrally and it doesn't seem like so much anymore.
2. First there's rent, which seems to wipe out half of your wage as soon as you get paid.
3. Before pay day, you start fretting over whether you can actually afford rent this month.
4. You promise yourself you'll find somewhere cheaper to live ASAP.
5. Topping up your Oyster manually makes travelling anywhere a nightmare your bank balance has to keep living.
6. You take the bus because the tube is a luxury that can only be used on or just after pay day.
7. Towards the end of the month, you might have to actually walk because topping up your Oyster just isn't happening.
8. You praise Jesus on the days your bus is a new Routemaster so you can sneak onto the back without actually paying.
9. But you know the devil is real when an inspector gets on and asks to see all valid Oyster cards and travel tickets.
10. Living further out than zone two becomes a problem when you work centrally and can't actually afford to get in.
11. In fact, living anywhere further than zone two just becomes an issue full stop.
@jwbarwise1 Living in zone 5 has the same effect.
I CAN'T EVEN WALK INTO CENTRAL WITHOUT IT TAKING HALF MY LIFE.
12. You're forced to go to easyGym because you legit can't afford to go anywhere else.
13. Going to the cinema means going to the Peckhamplex because, despite the sticky floors, £4.99 for a ticket is a godsend.
14. You're surrounded by amazing attractions all the time, but actually going to them has to be seriously thought through.
London is hilarious because I CAN'T AFFORD TO DO ANYTHING
There's only so many times I can visit the Natural History Museum, but can I ~really~ afford going somewhere that will charge me to get in?
15. There a million amazing places to eat in London. It's just a shame you can't afford any of them.
16. If you do eat out somewhere nice, you instinctively look for the cheapest thing on the menu.
17. If you ever go out on the King's Road, you savour one drink for a good hour because getting two means beans on toast for the rest of the week.
18. And if you find yourself anywhere in Mayfair, you accept that tap water is as far as this night is going.
19. You feel incredibly awkward when people suggest doing rounds and have to subtly get yourself out of that deal.
20. If you go somewhere like Ministry of Sound, you have to strategically decide how much you can actually spend.
"@Mixmag: Have you ever spent $600,000 at a club?..." Well, the drinks are expensive in Ministry of Sound...
21. On top of that, you then have to decide how you're going to spend your allotted allowance for the night.
22. And also how you're going to get home, because Uber is out of the question.
23. Despite all that, living in London is still pretty great.
24. And 90% of people are in the same boat anyway.
