Sexy Uses Of Foods That Were Part Of The Graham Diet

Around 1829, Sylvester Graham invented the Graham Diet. He believed that adhering to the diet would prevent people from having impure thoughts and in turn would stop masturbation. If he could see this variation on his diet, though, he might get a little hot and bothered...

Fresh Fruits/Raspberry Ginger Tart

I need a moment alone with this tart.

Milk/Milkshake

It brings all the boys to the yard, which I'm pretty sure is the OPPOSITE of what Graham was going for.

Cornflakes/Fried Ice Cream

Anything rolled in ice cream is instantly more enticing.

Eggs/Eggs Benedict

*fans self*

Cheese/Lasagna

Cheese is the sexiest food ever, even in moderate amounts like Graham suggested, so he's just visiting crazytown on that one.

Fresh Veggies/Kale Chips

oh, my.

Whole Wheat / Whole Wheat Chocolate Cherry Waffles

It's getting hot in here.

Graham Crackers/S'mores

Oh Sylvester, you clearly weren't considering the gutteral moans one can emit while eating a delicious, delicious s'more.