BUZZ: Tila Tequila woke up this morning and decided she wanted to get totally naked and rant about her life troubles. Which, don't we all sometimes? But Tila took it to the next level and broadcast the entire naked rant on UStream TV. Snap judgment: Tila Tequila naked is not sufficient incentive to endure Tila Tequila's insane ravings. She has since (mercifully) removed the video. Update: If you didn't get to watch the video, Tila Tequila has “explained” her naked UStream video extravaganza to TMZ. It all makes sense now .

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BUZZ: In case you missed it: Mine That Bird, a horse favored only 50-1, became the second-biggest underdog to win the Kentucky Derby. Purchased for only $9,500 and ridden by jockey Calvin Borel, the horse pulled away from the pack toward the end of the run and won by almost seven lengths. I don't know about y'all, but I was rooting for Mr. Hot Stuff .

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BUZZ: Considered by many to represent the “real” Carrie Bradshaw, Allison is a media staple whose entrepreneurial methods of self-made online publicity have garnered her continued attention. As Gawker reports, she's gone from Jacob Lodwick to Chicago Bears QB, Jay Cutler. Starf*cker!

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Link: http://www.joestewart.org/cfeyechart....

If you're using a PC, this chart is a visual way of telling you whether you're infected by the Conficker worm. This would be a good way to tell people they are infected with horrible diseases. “Here's a cute puppy! You have AIDS!”

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Link: http://mlb.mlb.com/news/article.jsp?y...

Los Angeles Angels Pitcher Nick Adenhart was killed in a hit and run auto accident last night in Fullerton, CA. after making his 2009 debut last night against the Oakland Athletics. He pitched six shut-out innings before being relieved by the bullpen. A truly sad story!

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Link: http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/a...

Fishermen in the Philippines accidentally caught and then ate a rare megamouth shark. So rare that this megamouth was only the 41st recorded in the world.

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BUZZ: Square Root Day comes but 9 times a century — how will you celebrate? And you thought the nerdpocalpyse was fun! Games include — wait for it — cutting root vegetables into squares!!

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Link: http://www.catinthehat.org/history.htm

Theodor Seuss Geisel would have been 105 today. Did you know Dr. Seuss got his name in college when he was busted for having a drinking party. In order to continue writing for the school newspaper he started using the pseudonym Dr. Seuss. Who would have thought Dr. Seuss was such a bad ass rebel?

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We may not be in a Great Depression, but who says recession cuisine has to be just boxed mac & cheese? 93-year old Clara Cannucciari (who knows a thing or two about the Great Depression) recounts her childhood while she prepares meals from the era.

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BUZZ: CNBC's Rick Santelli called for a “Chicago Tea Party” to protest Obama's housing rescue plan and government spending in general. All the conservatives are banding together to form a revolutionary party! But not in a fun, carve-the-anarchy-symbol-into-your-arm, party revolution kind of way.

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Link: http://www.worldnudeday.com/

February 6 is World Nude Day! While it's a holiday celebrated mainly in New Zealand, the official website encourages all to take part. In order to celebrate you have to get naked and film yourself doing something funny. You can then upload it to the website and the funniest entry will win $10,000 in gold.

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Kate Micucci, best known for her role as Stephanie Gooch on Scrubs , plays “Dear Deer” on the ukulele. I think she's best described as the equally-adorbz female version of Demetri Martin.

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Link: http://barneysvideoresume.com/

Tonight's How I Met Your Mother referenced a video resume made by Neil Patrick Harris' character. It is real, and you can watch it (in awesome or not so awesome resolution—up to you).

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BUZZ: The Mad Men star is engaged to SNL's Fred Armisen. Most of us just learned they were dating, so it seems a little sudden (and weird when you factor in that Moss is a SciTi). “Lizzie,” as Fred calls her, is also currently starring in the infamous mercury-ridden production of Mamet's Speed the Plow .

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BUZZ: Marcus Schrenker has finally been captured in Florida after attempting to fake his own death and then actually trying to kill himself. Schrenker tried to fake a plane crash earlier this week: he called air traffic control, said his windshield had imploded and he was bleeding profusely, then parachuted out of the plane and headed for a motel. Schrenker soon fled the motel and was found days later at a Florida campsite—this time, actually bleeding profusely with slit wrists. Schrenker is the president of a wealth management company, so of course everyone is wondering if he tried to fake his own death because of losing a bunch of money or something.

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Link: http://images.google.com/images?q=por...

The Obamas have narrowed it down to a Labradoodle or a Portuguese Water Hound. They're definitely less trendy, but they've got that scrappy charm. I just hope they don't shave its butt .

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Link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/USS_Geor...

President George W. Bush landed Saturday on the USS George H.W. Bush, a new aircraft carrier named after his father.

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Link: http://www.momlogic.com/2009/01/john_...

John Travolta and Kelly Preston's autistic 16-year-old son dies from an apparent seizure while the family vacationed in the Bahamas.

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BUZZ: Melissa Jo Berry is a Lingerie Football League linebacker who's making waves today following news that she is suing her ex-boyfriend, Mark Dawson, for posting nude pictures of her online. Mark Dawson - just to make the story all the more absurdly humorous - is a professional “relationship expert.” Melissa Berry nude photos may well exist somewhere on the Web, but for now, people are having to make do with the sordid tale of a guy who's really bad at his job and the Lingerie Football League linebacker who used to love him.

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Link: http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,4...

John Costelloe, who played gay fireman/lover-short order cook Johnny Cakes in The Sopranos , has taken his life according to the NY Post. Costello, a former NYPD fireman, shot himself the head in his basement bedroom last week, leaving his many friends questioning, Why?

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