The World’s 13 Laziest Salmon
These salmon are bums. (h/t to McSweeney’s for the suggestion)
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The World's 13 Laziest Salmon
Baby Praying Mantis
2.
“Thanks for carrying me. I was getting tired.”
Source: images.quickblogcast.com / via: jrudyr.com
3.
“You want me to finish crossing the road? Do I look like a chicken to you?”
Source: 1.bp.blogspot.com / via: taotauajer.blogspot.com
6.
“Can you work my caudal fins for me? I can’t bring myself to bother.”
Source: accentinns.com / via: accentinns.com
7.
“I’ll spawn when I’m goddamned ready to spawn.”
Source: cdfgnews.files.wordpress.com / via: cdfgnews.wordpress.com
8.
“Do I look like I want to leap for you? Get out of here.”
Source: alaskaconservation.org / via: alaskaconservation.org
9.
“I meant to have the dentist do something about my teeth… Maybe I just need to floss more.”
Source: wildsalmonkitchen.com / via: wildsalmonkitchen.com
10.
“This was inevitable, really. It’s easier to just be done with it.”
11.
“I mean, he caught me. I’m not bothering to contest it, so I’ll just have to live with the consequences.”
Source: 4.bp.blogspot.com / via: bigfishesoftheworld.blogspot.com
12.
“Look, SHUT UP. I can see he’s right in front of me. I’ll eat him in a moment.”
Source: farm4.staticflickr.com / via: slang589
13.
“Dude, don’t act like it’s so weird to just see a fish sitting there. It happens. No need to judge me.”
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Moshi_Moshi 10 months agoI read all of these in the voice of Marvin from The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.
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