2. “Why does everyone feel compelled to touch me? Stop touching me. You’re gross.”
5. “Oh, you think I had fun at the beach? Beaches are theoretically fun until you factor in all the sand.”
7. “Grumpy Cat has a movie deal now? What’s the big deal? I can do the frowny thing too.”
9. “EXCUSE ME? Do I look like a frog who has time for your nonsense?”
13. “STFU about your chair feeling like a rock. My chair IS a rock.”
18. “Jesus. Is it so hard to put the dishes in the dishwasher?”
19. “What do you want me to do now? Haven’t I done enough already?”
Here Are The Top Stories
- More debris – believed to be part of the missing aircraft MH370 – has been found washed up on the Indian Ocean island of Réunion on Sunday.
- Cilla Black, the legendary English singer and TV star, has died at her home in Spain, according to local police. She was 72 years old.
- A conservation group at Oxford University told BuzzFeed News that media reports of Jericho's death were not true and that the 11-year-old lion was "alive and well".