Ms. T-Lowe’s a holy roller with a message from GOD
She’s rappin’ for the lord but it sure ain’t ODD
That a fundamentalist would be rhymin’ and STEALIN’
A bunch of platitudes in the guise of HEALIN’…
(aw yeah, now I gots to mix it up a bit…)
She disses the MATERIAL
To praise the ETHEREAL
But her faith is VENEREAL
So very PEDOPHILIAL

For all the people finding it difficult to hate this and being ashamed that they don’t; fear not, I hate it enough for all of you.

Oh boy…

I was just thinking (er, uh, praying) … hey, she looks like my real estate saleslady , and … well …
Why aren’t there any great Christian Rap Rants ?
You know, real holy-rap-a-tap that could go with a Wednesday “church night” of dancing with snakes, drinking strychnine, and talking in tongues? Then I saw this video. My life is almost complete. It surely IS the endtime Apocalypse. Praise! She does need an accordion accompaniment to truly make it a Christian rap tune. And maybe a bit of holy-rolling tap dancing too.

she had me until she mentioned law and order: svu not holding the answers to every dilemma in life, and i immediately turned it off.

I did not expect to like this but…
job well done lady.

Y’all remember Vince Fontaine from “Grease”? That’s what this reminds me of, not rap at all, just schlocky Emcee rhymes from some community center polka dance off.
The Rydell Dance rhyme “”Thank you, fans and friends and odds and ends. And now, for you gals and guys, a few words to the wise. You Jims and Sals are my best pals. And to look your best for the big contest, just be yourselves and have a ball. That’s what it’s all about, after all. So, forget about the camera and think about the beat. We’ll give the folks at home a real big treat. Don’t worry about where the camera is, just keep on dancin’, that’s your biz. Hey, if I tap your shoulder, move to the side. Let the others finish the ride! This is the event you’ve all been waiting for, the National Dance-Off. And away we go with Johnny Casino and the Gamblers! “”“

This is Fergie after she found Jesus.

It’s more like spoken word

she’s actually not bad.
and she has on about as much jewelry as the average rapper.

Aww. Thanks mom. She tried.

I like how she talks about not buying all the crap people want to sell you but she’s blinged out.

More like a poetry jam than a rap….

That… that… actually wasn’t bad. Not bad at all. I’m shocked.

I wouldn’t call that rapping. She’s just talking. Then again, most rappers just talk. But there’s not music.

I liked the not-so-subtle Fox News dig.

I usually hate religious zealots, but that was freakin’ awesome. …now if only God were real.

My grandma’s church was irrelevant punk junk? Screw you, WHORE!