The 10 Biggest Saves From Last Night’s Golden Globes

If the ship is starting to go down, you better know someone who can find the life jackets. Looking at you, Tom Hanks. #SaveMeCaptainPhillips

1. 1. Matt Damon improvising

When the teleprompter failed, Matt Damon stepped up to the plate and managed to deliver an appropriate, well-informed and sincere intro for Captain Phillips. Kudos, Garbage Person.

2. 2. Giuliana Rancic cutting off the mani-cam

To be fair, Giuliana kind of asked for this one. She encouraged Elisabeth Moss to do whatever she wanted because, “This is E!” So after double checking with her interviewer, Peggy Olson went for the most obvious stunt you could pull with a mani-cam (*hint* it involves a special finger). Luckily, a shocked Giuliana dove for the offensive hand gesture just in time.

3. 3. Jonah Hill fessing up

When Jonah took the stage with his TWOWS co-star Margot Robbie we were met with an uncomfortable pause and some nervous laughter. While a more refined actor (*cough* Matt Damon) might improvise something or throw in a joke, Jonah decided to go for the truth. “I’m not going to lie to you, right now. They put up the wrong stuff on the teleprompter.”

Bonus save: whichever crew member made the mad dash to the stage with a paper copy of the teleprompter script

4. 4. Alex Ebert being the gentleman to Sean Diddy Comb’s hot mess

The Golden Globe for Best Original Score went to this shirtless, shower-less, hippie….who turned out to not be the most inappropriate part of the show. That “award” goes to Sean P. Diddy Puff Daddy Whatever-his-name-is-now Combs, who not only tried to ad lib jokes and stand in front of his fellow presenters but used part of Alex’ precious acceptance speech time to reminisce about how they had met on a boat. Alex went with it and ended up coming off as funny, sincere and assumedly talented (won’t lie, haven’t seen the movie).

5. 5. The best should’ve-been-boring speech save

This wonderful man (aka Theo Kingma aka President of the HFPA) managed to take the stage and make the most perfect president’s speech. He cracked two self-deprecating jokes and kept the whole thing to under 30 seconds. He’s got my vote: Kingma 2016!

6. 6. The dynamic hosts

What could have been a dull 3 hours (5, if you include the red carpet) was saved by the witty one-liners and hilarious hijinks of our dynamo hostesses with the mostesses! Sure, I didn’t find their schtick quite as original or funny as last year, but they still got major laughs and hopefully a renewal on their hosting contract.

7. 7. Diane Keaton stepping in for Woody Allen

While I personally feel that not showing up for an award celebrating your lifetime of work that you know you are going to win ahead of time is sort of a dick move…. I think we may have saved ourselves listening to a lengthy list of names of people we don’t know followed by a minute-long standing ovation. We also would have missed Diane Keaton inexplicably belting out a tune!

8. 8. Every actor who booted it or assisted in the booting of a winner’s ass to the stage

This is for all of the speed walkers, chair-tucker-inners and high-five-over-handshakers who kept this ship on it’s precise 3 hour course.

9. 9. Miss Golden Globes: Sosie Bacon

Girlfriend was booking it left, right and center trying to direct the frazzled winners and slow-paced presenters off the stage in a timely manner and through the proper exit. She managed to look composed all night and even allowed herself a non-traffic-cop moment to laugh at Amy Poehler as her Mr. Golden Globes.

10. 10. Whoever was cueing the cut-off music

“And….cue music!”

You, sir/madam/robot, are our savior. Next year, don’t be afraid to start that music even earlier and really crank up the volume

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