1. She has more “Bieber” than Justin himself.
2. You can’t tell the difference between her and Ellen Degeneres.
3. She can hold her own with Jimmy Fallon.
4. She said what we were all thinking about the Winter Olympics.
5. As a matter of fact, she’s always saying what everyone else is thinking.
6. I mean, c’mon, EVERYONE is a Beyoncé fan.
Get your shit together, Seth.
7. She proved awkward stages don’t last forever.
8. And declared the true breakfast of champions.
9. For Kate, it’s never the wrong time to bust a move.
10. Subsequently, her dance moves are impeccable.
11. She’s a role model to girls everywhere.
12. And her animal impressions are on point.
13. Her Billie Jean-King skit brought you to tears of laughter.
14. And her worst nightmare is ours, too.
15. Without her, we’d never know how to properly use a lawn mower.
16. She knows more about the health care plan than Hilary Clinton.
BlueCross BlueShield is so Obama 2012. It’s all about BlueCross BlueBalls now.
17. And she taught us to stay away from drugs.
Seriously, don’t do drugs.
18. She made us believe, just for a second, that Effie Trinket is real.
In this case, I guess the odds weren’t in her favor.
19. And that a woman can do any job a man can.
20. She also taught us how to properly pick up guys at a bar.
21. She has her priorities straight.
22. How do you win a pageant? Ask Kate.
23. She reminded us to never mess with Martha Stewart.
Orange Is The New Black has nothing on Martha.