How Kate Middleton Learned To Let Loose For Her Exotic Island Adventure

Stiletto pumps and anti-frizz cream won’t do when you’re in the Solomon islands, where the de-facto mode of transit seems to be a boat, and the humidity always wins.

1. The red carpet was rolled out for the Duchess’s arrival on Guadalcanal Island.

Prince William can obviously just walk on the pavement next to it.

The two toured the islands over the weekend as part of their never-ending Diamond Jubilee appearances in the Queen’s honor.

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2. Kate de-planed wearing a cinched pillowcase and hat that, frankly, could have been a lot more festive.

But with those perfectly bouyant, frizz-less curls she looks like a brunette Goldilocks. In other words: WINNING.

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The lei was her best accent — the non-crown accessory she never knew she needed.

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4. She looked much more island-ready than Prince William.

But who cares about him? Moving on!

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5. Kate’s somewhat matronly look fit right in at St. Barnabus Cathedral.

This is what you call Sunday Best.

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6. By nightfall, Kate’s island style seemed almost second nature.

Her wedges, dress, and blinglessness were perfect. William on the other hand…

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Knows he should have gotten a spray tan before getting photographed in this shade of blue!

(This is the traditional dress of the region, by the way.)

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8. The next day Kate, seized by a fit of confusion surely, seemed to think she was on a London sidewalk.

Stilettos:gravel::people caring:Prince William. Some things just don’t go, you know!

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9. Kate walked around with a bouquet.

Presumably laughing at the thought of how this is probably how a plebeian feels on her wedding day.

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10. Kate did one of the things she does best.

Bend over and accept gifts from adorable local children.

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11. Eventually her hair just gave way.

Unleashed from the confines of her regular blowout, curling iron, and mousse. Humidity is like going through security at the airport — one of the world’s greatest equalizers.

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12. Kate attempted to ward off the elements with an umbrella on this boat trip.

The elements laughed in her face.

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13. So that plan was quickly abandoned!

The shark in the background is not a princess eater, don’t worry!

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The locals just dressed as “sharks” and followed the boat.

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15. Finally Kate really let loose.

And went SHOE-LESS IN THE GRASS, which has to be a royal’s version of going noticeably bra-less.

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16. William also looked appropriately not-quite-disheveled, but less “perfect” than usual.

I kid about how we don’t care about him and his “clothes” (which we don’t) but I do admire men who aren’t afraid of jewel tones.

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17. The Duke and Duchess looked radiant during this procession.

Except for maybe William, who for once wishes they could take a vacation without being photographed constantly.

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18. Back on this boat, they returned to their comfort zone.

A leather throne.

FIN.

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