1. Take a moment to transport yourself back — way, WAY BACK — to the summer of 2007.
2. After four long years on the air, The Simple Life was about to end.
4. The Kardashians were nobodies!
5. The stock market hadn’t even crashed.
6. And Twitter looked like this.
7. So, what was Amanda Bynes doing at this time?
8. Why, she was launching her clothing line. Remember pre-recession times, when every celebrity had one of those? Hers was named “Dear.”
She designed it for Steve & Barry, a victim of the recession that also carried Sarah Jessica Parker’s line “Bitten,” which you also probably forgot.
9. The clothes were the picture of innocence.
Waldo turtlenecks, charm jewelry, hoodies with a music note motif.
10. Amanda appeared in promotional materials for the line.
11. When she attended the New York launch event in August at a downtown sushi restaurant, she looked kind of like Lindsay Lohan.
Because I’m just that prescient, I noted the similarity in my report of the event for NYmag.com. “I never got to go to prom. I’ve been working since I was 7. I’ve been on TV since I was 10,” she told me. “It was time for me to glam it up. I’m 21 — these are the things that appeal to me!”
12. Bynes wore a deer around her neck.
Dear, deer — you know.
13. The Steve & Barry’s founder posed gleefully with a glowing Bynes at another event promoting her Seventeen cover.
14. Waist belts were happening. Strawberry cake was eaten.
15. Bynes’s adoring fans crammed into a booth to bask in her presence.
16. And when the line finally hit stores, people of all ages showed up to record it with camcorders and large cameras.
17. Because not that many people had iPhones yet.
18. Fast forward to now: and Bynes is being stealth-recorded spastically working out at the gym.
19. And starting a clothing line. Inspired by Justin Bieber.
“I love Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen’s clothing line, Elizabeth and James, and I love how Justin Bieber dresses,” she told InTouch. “My line will be a mixture of sick styles, and it’s going to be for everybody.”