Why Is "The New York Times" So Offended By Shirtless Guys?

A handy explainer in Romy & Michele’s High School Reunion GIFs.

2. New York Times writer Guy Trebay is very concerned about a new trend in men’s clothing. Or lack thereof.

3. He’s worried guys like these. More specifically, their scandalously bare torsos.

5. And this guy too.

I think we would ALL buy whatever calendar he’s selling.

6. One more.

The Times helpfully includes a gallery of its own examples, because there are apparently people out there who can turn an afternoon spent cruising hotties in Midtown into a paid venture.

7. And below, an in-depth analysis of his fears:

For reference: those Orlando photos. You’re welcome!

And you would definitely need to call all your friends if you just saw Orlando Bloom shirtless to be like, “OMG I just saw Orlando Bloom shirtless, I can now die happy.”

(Never do this on the R train, because you will get diseases.)

30. Read the article in full here. It’s a treat.

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