And still no Flash, dammit!

How about the iTurtleneck for Jobs?

Isn't this missing a couple of product iterations? Like the iPad with Wings, then the iPad with Wings and a Special Comfort Lining That Keeps the Moisture Away From Your Skin, the iPad Extra Long with Wings and a Special Comfort Lining That Keeps the Moisture Away From Your Skin and That Includes Some Other Stuff We Left Off the First iPad Just To Piss Off the Early Adopters, the iPad With Wings That Doesn't Absorb Quite As Much But That's $20 Cheaper and That Includes a Couple of Important Components That People Expected To Get Back When We Suckered Them Into Buying the First iPad, and the iPad That Sort of Does What We Claimed the First One Would Do, Finally…

well, the iBoard and the iMat has a camera lulz