1. You were teased because of your eyebrow(s) as a child.
Eyebrow level: outrageous.
2. You’re afraid that your knuckle hair will ruin this shot one day.
3. People always make the same hobbit joke when they notice how hairy your toes are.
And it’s never funny.
4. You regularly discover patches of hair that you didn’t know were there before and are too scared to ask if anyone else has hair there too.
Does anyone else have little hairs on the side of their hand? Right under their pinky finger? No? OK.
5. Most bracelets are out of the question because they snag your arm hair and that HURTS.
Especially the ones that have elastic in them. Ouch.
6. You’ve gone to get a wax and the technician has just assumed that you want your crack done too.
They’ll flip you over like a goddamn steak.
7. You could win a stache-off between yourself and most preteen boys.
And yeah, you’ve gotten latte foam stuck in it.
8. Just saying: nipple hair.
They know it’s there, you know it’s there…
9. Your underwear fits differently based on whether or not you shaved.
Let’s just say that you look “fuller” when you haven’t trimmed.
10. You lose more hair in the shower than you think most people have on their heads.
Depending on your screen, this might be actual size.
11. If you decide to shave your legs you have to rinse your razor after every half-stroke.
You’re also a million times more likely to just say “screw it” and wear pants.
12. If you decide to shave your armpits the hair grows back fifteen minutes after you get out of the shower.
And probably feels like copper wires poking through your skin.
13. You had to come up with a makeup hack to deal with facial fuzz.
Protip: Always brush your foundation on with top-to-bottom strokes, it smooths your peach fuzz down!
14. You’ve taken “not by the hair of my chinny chin chin” personally.
Pardon me while I thoughtfully stroke my micro-beard.
15. You’ve caught yourself idly petting your leg/arm/torso hair.
Admit it, it feels kind of nice.
16. You have a chronic fear of being photographed from below.
No one needs to know about the nose hair situation.
17. You’ve over-applied lotion and had it pile up in your arm hair.
Think of it as a leave-in conditioner.
18. You’ve tried all of those “as seen on TV” hair removal products.
But your hair is like “no power in the ‘verse can stop me.”
19. There’s one spot on your leg that you always miss while shaving. Those hairs are probably two inches long by now.
20. You don’t like showing your hairline because your extra hair growth makes it all kinds of uneven.
Ponytail game’s strong, though.
21. You have subtle, but very present booty fuzz.
And you’re very sensitive about it.
22. But — you never have to worry about filling in your eyebrows.
Those same girls who teased you are now using pencil to fake their brows and you’re like “lol.”
23. And since your body hair grows fast, your head-hair probably grows fast too!
Even if you don’t have long hair it’s probably super thick!
- President Obama is one vote away from sealing a historic nuclear deal with Iran after two Democratic senators backed the agreement. ›
- The fingerprints of the main suspect behind last month's deadly Bangkok shrine blast match those found on bomb-making material, Thai police say. ›
- Missouri executed Roderick Nunley Tuesday night for a 1989 rape and murder. It was the state's sixth execution this year, and the nation's 20th. ›