1. Wait, what did you say?
2. They're turning [BOOK] into a movie?!
3. Let me google every combination of the book title and the words "movie" to over-confirm this splendiferous news.
4. No, that's a casting rumor from 2009.
5. No, that's a student-made trailer some 8th graders did for a Language Arts project.
6. No, that's a fanvid set to Cyndi Lauper's "Time After Time."
7. Wait.
8. Yes. There it is.
9. AN IMDB PAGE. WITH A PRODUCTION DATE.
10. IT'S HAPPENING.
11. My whole body is tingling.
12. YAASSS.
13. I wonder if they need any on-set experts to help bring the magic to life?
14. I volunteer as tribute!
15. I mean how are they going to stay true to the complex themes and emotional core of the book series in such a flawed medium as film?
16. The whole thing is hedging on who they pick to direct.
17. If it's Tim Burton I swear I'll flip a table.
18. They should just let fans direct the movie.
19. And by fans I mean me.
20. Where do I sign up for that?
21. Can I submit my resume?
22. Does fan fiction count as screenwriting experience?
23. I've been fan-casting this film since I was a child.
24. It's going to be so gratifying to see who they choose to fill out this diverse, important cast of nuanced characters.
25. Maybe this time we'll get Jesse Williams!
26. -starts online petition to cast Jesse Williams-
27. I'll just set a little Google Alert for movie news and see what happens, eh?
28. -waits-
29. -waits-
30. FEED ME A SET PHOTO
31. -waits-
32. -waits-
33. They're casting WHO? For WHAT?
34. That's atrocious.
35. I'm writing a thinkpiece on why the casting decisions are terrible and putting it on my tumblr.
36. I got six notes. SIX. That's how many people agree with me.
37. Keep on fighting for better casting, friends. It's up to the seven of us.
38. What's happening now?
39.They're going to split it into two movies?
40. Three?
41. Why are they splitting the last book into two movies?
42. IT'S THE SHORTEST BOOK.
43. It's almost like they're just doing this to make money :(
44. That's it. I'm boycotting.
45. No book-movie for me.
46. I'm going to tell anyone who will listen that they're RUINING the author's vision.
47. I mean, technically the author is writing the screenplay but the Hollywood machine is going to CRUSH THEIR SOUL.
48. Never seeing this movie.
49. Ugh.
50. Not once.
51. Nope.
52. I'm a real fan.
53. Look how well I resist the— wait.
54. Is that…a teaser trailer?
55. THIS IS GOING TO BE THE BEST MOVIE OF ALL TIME!!!!
