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    21 Things That Could Only Happen In Waitrose

    Rosemary and sea salt focaccia? It's essential, darling.

    1. Welcome to Waitrose – one of Britain's greatest tourist attractions.

    2. It's a place where the English language won't always cut it.

    You know you're in Waitrose when the breaded haddock ticket is in Latin

    3. But it will always give you the warmest of welcomes.

    Only in Waitrose darling will you find a brass band playing!

    4. At Waitrose, comfort is king.

    Only in Waitrose would you find cashmere toilet roll...!

    5. And everyone is given a choice.

    Only in Waitrose do you get to decide whether victims of child sexual exploitation are more worthy of funding than beekeepers.

    6. The average customer is mature beyond their years.

    7. They've got their lives in order.

    You know you're in Waitrose when you hear a child say 'daddy, I'll meet you by the legumes'.

    8. And they're suckers for a bargain.

    You know you're in Waitrose when this is considered a bargain...

    9. Waitrose understands the important things in life.

    Only in Waitrose would rosemary and sea salt focaccia be an essential....

    Only in waitrose would Camembert be an essential #upperclasslife :p

    10. And forces you to ask the difficult questions.

    "Do you think they'll do Heston's new meals in a dine in offer or not Rupert?"

    11. It's a place where the exceptional comes as standard.

    12. Where we've come to expect the finer things in life.

    You know you're in Waitrose when you overhear a child say: "Mummy, please can we have some Guacamole?"

    13. Though sometimes it leaves us a little spoilt.

    You know you're in Waitrose when you hear a child shouting at their mum because she refuses to by them anymore pâté.

    14. As with many classy establishments, Waitrose is sadly no stranger to the odd act of vandalism.

    Only in Waitrose would you find a grammatically incorrect sign amended by a passing customer ....

    15. In fact, it can be an outright death trap.

    Health And Safety Gone Mad! #overheardinwaitrose #Middleclassproblems #firstworldproblems

    16. But that's just what happens when you open your doors to all comers.

    17. Whether you've come for the regular produce.

    A woman quietly asked me if we sold anything as 'common' as ketchup. #waitroseproblems

    18. Something a little fancier.

    Only in Waitrose would you find these! Lol #MiddleClass

    19. Or the highbrow literature.

    20. You won't just leave with a trolleyful of essential joy.

    21. You'll leave with an education.